Sunday, February 10, 2008

For the Gift of Health






Tears are streaming down my face as nurses labor over by weak and overheating body to find a vein within which to insert an IV for the much needed fluids to bring me back from the brink of convulsions, intubations and God knows what. It has been two days since this illness has been ravaging my body, two days since I have been able to function as I know how, two days since I have been able to pray as I should and ten minutes since I brought up my enzyme devoured insides in a gory mixture of blood and bile to decorate the kind nurses' shoes with.

I am trying to call God's name. I cannot. I try to call my mother. I cannot. The only sounds that emanate accompanied with the putrid breath of sickness from my mouth are guttural and incomprehensible. I am 23 years old and the nurses are talking softly to calm me down as though I were a baby. I have been stripped of clothing as liquids have been expelled from avenues I can no longer control. My eyes are beginning to roll back and even though they do not raise alarm, I can sense their panic...especially as a doctor comes in and takes over.

That was wednesday. This is Sunday. And it seems a lifetime ago. I can do nothing but thank God that he chose not take me now and in such a painful manner. My parents placed frantic calls once they found out and were thrown into more dissarray when I could not respond to them over the phone. I was so weak, I could not pray for myself. My father prayed for me. Over the phone. My aunt and her friends dropped all they were doing to rush to my side. My roommate watched in helpless panic as I deteriorated before her eyes.

Why this long story? Because it is February. The Days of love. When most people look to chocolates, wine, jewelry, pre-inscribed words on a card and an expensive restaurant dinner as fufliment of love in their lives. I never thought I would be 23 and would never have had a val but after last week it would have been worse to just end at 23 and never truly lived.

Join me, if you wish- this is not to say that if you do, something is lacking- and celebrate the gifts that we have this month. I spent just a few days incapacitated praying for healing and I was spent. Imagine those whose prayer that has been since their first breath on this earth.

Take things easy. My break down was brought on by stress. I was going through financial issues, school issues, a break up and I just kept going and going and going and not taking time to just breathe. I am glad God stopped me this way and not worse. Imagine if I had had a stroke or something.....God forbid. Still, it could be worse.

It's February. You are alive and well. Be happy for that. Greet the day with joy and excitement. Take a second look at that which you call mundane and try and see what is spicy about what you do. Realise that your life is full, so that you are not looking for someone to fill it for you but to share it with and someone who realising what an opportunity you have given them would choose to share theirs with you.

Let's lift our glasses...of juice and soda (no alcoholics here...Rayo step away from the bottle) and let's drink to the gift of good health.

It has been God's valentine to me. And I share with you.

38 comments:

Queen of My Castle said...

I thank God that you are better and that all is well. I pray that you begin to take more time for Catwalq to relax her ever thining mind.

Take care love

bumight said...

Didn't know it was that deep. thought u also caught the flu. I Thank God for ur health, we seem to forget about that till its not there anymore.
Happy healthy Valentine!

uknaija said...

Thank God you're better...take am easy o!

Jaycee said...

I lift my glass of juice and soda to you Catwalq! I'm so glad that you've been given the gift of life by the God of second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth....etc...chances! I love this post so much...(thanks).

It teaches us that we shd not look to material things in this life to be happy...we shd really not get stressed abt the things of life. EVERYTHING will always work together for our own good.

Loved this. Hope u feel a lil bit better today. Cheers to health for your body, soul, and spirit in the remaining days of 2008 for u (and even in many years to come). May God replenish all the liquids and juices of ur internal organs, in Jesus Name. Amen.

Have a blessed week....(*wink*)

Jinta said...

i join rayo in raising my alcoholic glass to your good health

archiwiz said...

Wow!!! Thank God for your life ohh. I swung by your blog from a friend's page and your words reached out from the page and touched me. Indeed, this is just one way that God has shown how much He loves you.

Consciousness said...

...yes sista!!

...Chink-chink to (y)our health...we went potty with worry...PLEASE BE EZ's o'...A day at A time from now on...

Peace!
C!!

Jaybabe said...

Ooooh Catty! It shall be well with you ehh?

God! I thought it was just the flu now!!!

Be carefull hey?...

Anonymous said...

awwwwww pele my dear,it is well wit u.happy u r gettin better.pls try avoidin a repaet bin future cos in as much as we dont know each other u ve friends who care.take care of u ok.happy valentine

Allied said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Allied said...

I raise my glass with you. I did not know it was that bad.. A dupe lowo Olurun to fun e ni alafia.

Take it easy, reading from your post it seems you are going through a lot but the key word is "going through" It will all pass soon.

Re your question on my page, let just say i was invovled with one desi for two years.. i am also in IT.. can't escape them.

36 INCHES OF BROWN LEGS said...

Happy valentines month my darling, glad u r feeling much better.

Pink-satin said...

take goodness you better!take crae of u

30+ said...

Kpele o and congrats.

I did not know it was that bad 'cos I was thinking you are still bloggin now.

Raised glasses to you

darkelcee said...

I raise my glass to Good health!

Thank God you are much more better.

love

Isi said...

good to know u are feeling better

guerreiranigeriana said...

kai, i thought it was another story...i am glad you are feeling better...*raises her glass of red wine-they said it is good for your heart*...

geisha said...

aww sweetie... thank God for your health. thank God you're ok, thank God you're alive!
we take life and everything so much for granted.

Afrobabe said...

awww, so glad you are well babes.

just take it easy for a few days...

happy vals....and here is to good health...

little miss me said...

thank GOd for you speedy recovery..happy February and vals day in advance!

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Catwalq: you have to take it easy. I thank God for your life and the blessings he has given to you and still has in store for you.

gishungwa said...

Am thankful that you are well, that my country is calm again. Happy Valentine my dear and get well soonest.

Lighty said...

God! thank God u're ok now. that must av been really scary. its a good thing we have back.

happy valentines kitty-cat. u just take it slow and be happy. God is with u.

Flowers and Poetry said...

I'm going through a "low moment" myself and I thank you for reminding me to count my blessings cos once there is life, there's hope.

Please take things easy, I'm sincerely glad that you are much better now.

Atutupoyoyo said...

Pele boo. Take it easy o

naijababe said...

To health, i toast with u, it is well! Thank God for divine healing, take it easy ehn

Sherri said...

glad to hear u're better babe.
please take care of urself.

stay blessed luv.

Naija chic said...

Hi Catwalq,

I am soo tired now and only hope this summarises what I av to say - I spent the last 5hrs on your blog...read everything (plus some comments) from Post 1!

Keep it up girl, I am too tired and so uninspired to even post a blog up on mine after going thru urs...

eFJay said...

Thank God for your life o... take care of you!

Happy Valentine!

Zephi Fahrenheit said...

Thank God for his mercies on your life....
four days ago I was so sick...I was puking coughing, with serious fever, lost about 5 pounds and I am still finding it difficult to eat properly....I am thankful that I am getting better..

I am thankful to God for you as well

Mocha said...

Are you okay girl???
Didnt know it was that bad!
I'm grateful to God that you're doing much better..
Pls take good care of you.
*raising glass* here's to ALL of your lives!..lol..

N.I.M.M.O said...

Came here to wish you a happy Valentine's. Thank God you are better now.

May the blessings be.

anonymous gal said...

Hope u are beta.read ur last blog thot it was just one of those things u know flu.

Nwanyi Ocha said...

Ooooooohhhhhh where have i been?

Haba Catwalq, thank God ohh, i'm glad your feeling much better my dear and i support your sentiment

I'm thanking God for not just life but a healthy life!!!

I'm lifting my vodka & cranberry, cheers hun

Bunmmy said...

babes take it easy on yourself. Thank God you feel much beta.

CATWALQ a.k.a LAGBA-JESS said...

QOMC: Thanks. I am trying

Bumight: omo, that is what I thought o. o kan re mi wa seriously

UKnaija: men, u stopped by? It is a lie....thanks

Jaycee: my sister, thanks jare...

Boda Jinta: I feel so sorry for you and Rayo...when I have a party, i am having breatherlizers for the two of you before u enter....

archiwiz: awwwww, thanks...welcome

Consciousness: i must say, this your shortest comment yet...thanks luv

Jaybabe: ehn, that is you and ur backside.....o ti o

Anonymous1: thanks so much. I am indeed taking it easy and am heeding your advice. thanks

Allied: my sister in the words....u and I need to have lunch or something cos this desi gist is something we need to break down....was going to take pity on Abhishek and marry him, then he went and married that heiffer. i am not speaking to him again....unless he really begs me....

36: thanks for stopping by. I don't know if this means you are back. if it doesn't, I wish you well and still maintain that you have been an inspiration to me. that and the fact that my school bill is in the mail....don't fail me now sis....

Pink satin: thanks alot

30+: me myself, I don't understand...thanks sha. how is the boddie?

darkelcee: thanks...what does ur name mean?

isi: thanks o...

guerriN: thanks alot o

Geisha: kisses....

Afrobabe: u dis yeye girl....thanks jare...

Lil Miss me: thanks

Solomonsydelle: my inlaw...May God be with you as well...thanks for everything

Gishungwa: thanks alot...how have u been?

Lighty: take it slow ow, oww, owwwwwww...*imagine, John Legend singing here*.....thanks oooooooo

Flowers and Poetry: aaaahhh, please take it easy o...that is what I was trying to do and I fell ill. one day at a time, my sis, please....be safe ehn, and you can always hang out here as long as you want...

Atutu: kisses...and a hug and a smack....where is my peppersoup?

Naijababe: May The Blessings Be to divine healing...thanks

Sherri: thanks and here's to you...

naija chic: wow, thanks...that must have taken a long time....I am sad that I uninspire u...*sob*, it's supposed to work the other way...thanks for stopping by.

efjay: thanks o jare

Zephi: na wah o...only God knows what was going on...please take it easy o. we just have to thank God with his little mercies...

mocha: thank u..

Nimmo: I thought u had abandoned us ooooo....how r u?

anonymous gal: my sister, it was one of those things...it was a yeye cold but because my body was so exhausted and overused, everything just shut down....

nwanyi ocha: go and sit over there with rayo and boda jinta. all ye leagues of extraordinary alcoholics

Bummy: Thanks and take care too

shola pacheco said...

been a while since i visited,i raise my glass as well lagbajess.heres 2 ur good health.

Naapali said...

I am glad you are doing better and grateful for your well being. I have been gone a while so did not realize you were unwell.

Stay healthy and be well