Friday, January 18, 2008

Tide & Enitan (Version 1)

I was looking through some of my old notebooks for one that was not too used that I could recycle for one of the classes I was taken and I stumbled across some writing I had done a few years back. I actually started this particular story in secondary school and I entitled Tide & Enitan.
It was fictional and based on the idea of what would happen if Queen's College was to merge with King's College. I always thought I would find a best friend who was a guy and we would exchange notes in class. I actually had an entire big note filled with the story and friends would borrow it to read. Then one day, I went home because I was ill and when I came back, it was gone. That was one thing that really hurt me to loose because in many ways the story mirrored alot of what I wished was happening to me as a fourteen year old who was trying not to be overwhelmed with her insecurities and the disparities her fantasies brought to her real life. Also, because I could count on one hand the number of guys I knew who weren't family (and even family could fit on one hand...okay, maybe two) and I was trying to imagine what guys talked like.
Anyways, two years ago at my internship, I was bored out of my mind and so decided to continue but fast forwarding to years later. It did not necessarily have to be Tide and Enitan but it was all about a guy and a girl who were best friends.

I must warn you, it is a bit long. Remember, what they are saying to each other is written on paper in notes exchanged when they cannot directly speak but are in close proximity. So imagine that they are in a meeting or something....

I called you last night. Why did you not pick up?

I wasn't home.

Bull. I was downstairs when I called you.

What? you came to my apartment yesterday?


I did not know that

Would you have let me in if you had?

I don't know

What is happening between us? Why is everything getting complicated? It was not supposed to turn out this way

Well things don't always turn out the way they are supposed to.

Can we talk about this?

There is nothing to talk about.

I disagree...You are just trying to punish me. I said I was sorry. Let's talk over lunch. Once the meeting is over, let's do that. At Benny's.

I am not hungry. Plus, I brought lunch.

Great. What delicious concoction have you prepared today?

I did not say that I brought any for you


Look, I am sorry but you have to respect my decision. I have thought long and hard and it is best if we have some distance between us. At least, until Meimuna is more comfortable with you and I.

I am afraid that I can't accept that. I am sorry about what happened on Saturday and I have told her that you and I are only friends. She has to accept that. I do not tell her whom she can or cannot be friends with

Look, we have always know that our friendship would cause us some problems. This is not the first time. No one understands what we have and many people we know are threatened by our closeness. If I was in Meimuna's shoes, I would be too.

You would act the way she did on Saturday? That is not you.

Maybe I would not be that aggressive but I would definitely be cautious about a woman that the man I am in love with is friend's with.

Are you saying that I do not feel for her what she feels for me?

Do you?

U know the answer to that...and I don't know why both of you need me to prove it.

When I was with Micheal, he hated your guts. He never wanted you around. he always said that I compared him to you. I think he was right.

I am sorry that I am all of this hotness that he could not measure up.

Shut up.

lol. but seriously, we have been friends for over ten years. We have been through it all. It is very tiring to constantly have to reasure her that though you and I are more family than friends.

You have it easy sef. I almost went mental with Micheal. there was a point that I started censoring every conversation with him to exclude your name and anything we did together...and you know we see everyday.

I never liked him. You should have stuck with Faruk.

Mumu, that's because the two of you were cut from the same fabric of idiot.


But really, there was a time I was very happy with Micheal

And most nauseating to look at. Both of you. You walked around like you were high. I always had to sniff you to make sure ganja had not become your new vitamin.

hahahaa. look who's talking about high. U think I am like you? Yes, he was good to me at one time. That is what I held on to at the end.

i thought you were very brave with all that happened...

You know me...always brave

Don't worry my dear, your prince will come.

I'll settle for a man

If you like sef, marry tree or coconut. As long as the bride price is brought to my house first

What happened to my father's house?

You forget that your father made me custodian of your sorry arse. I have invested money against how much you will fetch at the end of the day. And your father recognises my effort. My ad for you in the papers will soon pay off. I thought that mumu, Micheal would have played ball and I would have been able to retire but he went and fucked up. Now, I am stuck with you.

God will punish you.

lol...but on a serious note. If you want a prince, you should never settle.

I have a feeling you love it when I am single so you can gloat and be dispensing advice like you are some pro.

hey, I am a pro. And I don't like it when you are unhappy

I am not unhappy because I am single.

Why are you unhappy then? You do not smile as much as you used to. it is depressing to look at you

I am sorry that I am unpleasant to look at

That's not what I meant

What did you mean? ehn?

Look, we need to talk. There is no way we can write what we have to say to each other. I need to talk to you. To really tell you how sorry I am about Saturday.

I know you are sorry about Saturday...

But what?

You have Meimuna now. For you, she comes first. You have to appease her, you need to limit the way we see each other. If you want to see if you can build any lasting happiness with her. That's why I am pushing you away. That is why I am not working with you, not taking your calls. That's why you will not be included in lunch from now on. I want you to be happy my dear. She makes you happy and she needs me out of the big picture to be happy. That is your job. To make her happy. If it doesn't work out between the two of you, which I doubt will happen, I do not want to be a reason because with the way that I see you feel about her, if that ever is the case, you will one day despise me. I don't want that.


So you see?

I am sad.

pele. you will get over it.

So there goes our trips?

unless I have a boyfriend and we go in pairs

and my free food...I mean, your delicious cooking

that is the one I am most happy about. You cannot come and be raiding my fridge anyhow anymore.

Awwww...and I was doing you a favour or that food would have spoiled


and our sleepovers....can i have the recliner in the basement , seeing as you don't use it and I cannot come over anymore


What? Why? I am hurt.

I don't care. I keep the recliner. U think u're the only one that likes that chair. I still have not forgiven you for lying that the massage mechanism was not working.

It wasn't....I swear on ...I swear


Then I am keeping the karaoke machine.

dang! u know that's my joint

Umm-hmn, all my broken windows can attest to that fact.

awwww, you know you love my voice

Yes, it had brought me closer to God because anytime you pick up that microphone i pray that 1. the neighbours don't call the cops and 2. the roof does not fall. so far, the MAN has been good to me.

That's not fair. You need to make a list of all the stuff we have together and we'll split.

hahahahaha...u wish. I see some ojoro about to happen. I will have my lawyer call yours...

I had to stop here because it would have been too long. Still have so many pages. Reading this was an experience because I did not even remember that I had written it.

Oh and for those who could not figure out the previous post: bashir asked his wife to forget romoke (the missing maid of honour), with whom he knew she had been having a relationship.


30+ said...

Very Interesting read.

Talent boku!

Rayo said...

Interesting indeed!! More please!

It reminds me of the relationship I have with my male best friend.

Honeywell said...

this girl eh, your talent is not even easy at all... i found myself liking tide sef...

Nwanyi Ocha said...

Wow, can't believe you wrote this in sec school.

It's one of those things you wish (well i wished) i had when i was in school. A male perspective with an understanding of my world then.

really cool, love it.

Rayo said...

I soooo agree with Honeywell. I want them to end up realizing how much in love they are with each other...but that's not going to happen, is it?

bhookey said...

nice nice, ure gifted i tell u ,like the story tho, something most people can relate to.. lemme PR for u now lol...but yea i knew that was what that other post was about and they say im a dolo, hissssssss

bhookey said...

wait, oops she was the one having the affair, my bad lol im a dolo

Zephi said...

ahh the two of them shud kuku hook up..lolz

ehnn so she was a lesbian..would never have this girl how does your brain come up with ish like this

Anonymous said...

my dear i do so love ur posts.can i be ur friend?dont ve talent like u,m also an ex qc girl.pls come check out my own blog.not as gud as urs tho.kip it

Zena said...

I figured that out with the last story, I just didn't want it to end like that, kinda hurts when u know ur newly married bride is in love with a woman, can u imagine the ego and hurt....

You write so well, in secondary school? wow, this will mirror how many ppl feel with the whole a male being a best-friend and vice versa, and it wasn't long,

we're all waiting for the next part.

Afrobabe said...

nice...sounds like my friend and relationshp wise its akward cos we know and sad too much..

Anonymous said...

look this is the "diet" i told you about you should really enter the site :) bye enter the site

Queen of My Castle said...

I can so relate to this story. I actually have a friend like that. Once we became adults he once asked if there could be more, but I said no, because as Afrobabe stated, we had said and knew too much about each other.

As for the other story, I thought he was the one that was in a relationship with the maid of honor. Interesting twist. Love the way your mind works

Anonymous said...

that was like reading somebody else's i.m conversation. so you know it called out to my gbeborun inclinations!
men i just rhymed... check out this demonstration
but i will stop that now and spare you my ministration


eFJay said...

I absolutely loved that...

2 bad for bashir that his babe is in love with another woman lol!